Innocents

In his amazing travelogue, "Innocents Abroad," Mark Twain bemoans the bedevilment he and his mates suffered at the hands, and linguistics, of their guides. I am reading "Innocents" as I travel across Asia. In this marvelous book, the intrepid American travelers strike back at their quirky guides by naming them all Ferguson, regardless of nation, language or direct evidence to the contrary. Ferguson each and every guide became, and Ferguson they have remained.

As I set out into the mountainous jungle of the Nam Ha Protected Area, I decided to honour Mr. Clemens and think of all of my guides, henceforth, as Ferguson.

The day started out with Ferguson the First and a minivan ride to a small Khmore village. There, we met Ferguson II, a local Khmore tribesman. Their actual names are Som Tiem, and Boun Yang, respectively.

Ferguson II is pictured here, holding a broom he made in about three minutes with a bush knife, some palm fronds, and some bamboo strips.

Ferguson I is a town dweller, the village and town guide. Ferggie II is the real deal. He could make an entire household of furniture out of leaves and jungle flora before you could swipe your credit card at Home Depot.

So, into the jungle we plunged, Ferguson II in the lead, myself in the middle, and Ferguson the First batting cleanup.